Sunday, October 1, 2017

A Tracheotomy & 40 Days in an ICU after an Innocent ER Trip

Well world last we spoke I was starting Optivo. I had two rounds things were stable with scans in a few weeks. Around a week after cycle 2, I started having to use the oxygen tank I got when I had pneumonia. A day goes by wifh this and we took me to the ER. 

August 28th was the day we entered that ER. I also developed a stomach like I was birthing a baby. I knew they were ascites or the cancer in my torso lining. So we took me to the ER to hope the lungs were either the cancer, pnerumonia, hopefully not pnemonitis, or nothing. The stomach I hoped was a lot of bowel movements.

ER tells me my stomach is nothing and to follow up with my doctor. The ER did think something was wrong with my lungs and/or heart. Scans and waiting aside I was admitted to have a Broncoscope to determine what was causing my shortness of breath and my lungs were strong enough to handle this procedure. It would be a few nights in the hospital and I go home on the right treatment whether that was off Optivo, treatment for pneumonia or pneumonitis. 

40days later....I go home.

How did this happen? A basic procedure led to my lungs bleeding and I had to be intubated. A biopsy 6 doctors said to do & I almost died.

I wake up in the ICU and was told this by my family. The only way off the ventilator was my lungs are strong enough to go off intubation alone or a traecheotomy. WTF I was depressed and hooked up to a feeding tube I ripped out on a few occasions. Sad depressed exhausted all I did was sleep and hope maybe causing other issues would just end this nightmare. 

Now with lungs as weak as mine I doubted that I could come off ventilator and I did not want a traech. Honestly I wanted to die. 

I am being honest but I was alive and had two options to get home. We first got me off of the ventilator system, but my lungs absorbed too much CO2 & turned me into a nut job who now had one option-traecheotomy. 

Kyle and I discussed this. People wanted me home. I also could not live at the hospital trying chemo on a ventilator much longer. After much depression that ran so deep it hurt. I also woke up with pounds of weight loss and a defeated spirit. Goodbye normal life & hello traecheotomy. 

So now the goal for cancer was to get me off of the traech with a good chemo to get my lungs better. I can only hope that works because a life with a traech is not easy. I started Ixempra in the hospital. They did not think I would make it on chemotherapy with the state of my body. 

I survived and had two cycles of Ixempra by the time I went home with a traech and the body of a steriotypical cancer patient. 

We are finally home. I can't take care of anything but eating, drinking and doctors. 

I was discharged to a mini-nursing home and my new husband is my 24/7 nurse. Imagine not being able to walk, shower etc because you are attached to some type of life support. I also have a pleurX drain again as I was right about filing with fluid over 40 days ago.

We need help. I need help. I will be posting soon a site where people can help and with what. We will be paying for a CNA shortly because our parents & kyle are going to burn out too.

I'm not very much up for visitors now because I feel horrible about this all. I am adjusting to home. I will probably feel more at ease in ten days or so to have long visits. Right now we need to feed me, get me to doctors and out of this nightmare. 



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