Chemo Brain

What is Chemo Brain?  For us Cancer people, we know what it feels like. At 26, it just sucks. For the past three weeks I have been forgetting things and having memory lapses. I stopped reading, when I usually read 1 book a week. I have trouble concentrating on the words, then I find myself spacing out & staring at a wall. I can't multitask, if I do I forget one of the two things I am doing. It takes me twice as long to finish things, my thinking is slow and I can't process things the same. I feel like I am going crazy. You ever see Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind? I feel like Jim Carey in that movie, except I remember people. I just forget what the heck I am supposed to be doing. I have learned to cope by not reading. I watch movies, TV shows, and exercise. I have taken it with stride that I have the attention of a dried pea.

O well, at least I am not working now. Problem is I am returning to work in a month. My job requires me to write, read and focus on what people are saying. I am a therapist. I can't even focus on directions to microwave a hot pocket right now nor do I remember where my To-Do list is or that I even have one. That adjustment will be interesting. I will be more brain dead, I guess that is okay. Maybe my notes can all read, "Client is good. The End."

I also have class tomorrow. This is my last make-up class for my next license. I usually can't focus in these classes. Tomorrow will be interesting. I must bring myself lots of things to mindlessly entertain myself with..colorful notebook, crayons. You know the stuff a doodler can dream of. All I really need to do is show up & get the certificate and leave. I think that will be easy. I might even learn how to sleep with my eyes open. Now, that is something I have gotten good at focusing in on...sleep.